June 2, 2011

There Goes My Award...

My blog has been neglected for a while, due to a triple threat of prior pending obligations, creativity block, and pure laziness. And I'm saddened to inform you, my loyal readers, that in addition to missing out on the "Most Exciting Blog Content" award, I have also been taken out of the running for the "Mother of the Year" award. You see somehow, during my absence, my precious, beautiful, sweet angel daughter has turned into a....into....a three year old. Sure, she's technically been three years old since February. But she hasn't really BEEN a three year old until recently. Let me give you some examples.

Example #1: One day, not too long ago, we were enjoying a nice morning at the park. Lainey had found a little girl willing to indulge in her "I'm a monster I'mmmonnagetyou!" routine and they began to chase each other up and down the equipment. The other little girl was slightly older, and was there with an woman - I believe her grandmother - who looked to be a combination of bored and suicidal, only looking up for moments at a time to utter an "uh huh" when the child yelled something her direction. The girls were having a ball, giggling and running and sliding and jumping. Suddenly, my little angel stops from on top of the slide when she realized that the other girl hadn't followed her up the stairs. She pivots around and in a very serious tone she shouts "Come on, loser!" Ironically, the grandmother found this humorous.

Example #2: Last week, as I stood in the checkout line at Walmart (which, by the way, is a rock-solid guarantee you will be left behind in the event of a rapture - I'm really upset that I missed out on a great opportunity to poke fun at THAT "event") my same innocent little girl looks up at the cashier and says with a mischievous grin - "Get lost, FREAK!"

Example #3: My children were playing with some blocks on the living room floor. Owen decided it would be infinitely funny to play Godzilla on all the towers we had built, including Lainey's. My sweet daughter swooped up a wooden block and tossed it square at Owen's head. I sternly said "LAINEY!" to catch her attention but before I could scold her she grabbed up another block, handed it to me and said "I'm sorry, mama, here - you can hit him too."

This is the same girl who instructed me "Stop speaking, I'm trying to be mad at you." The same girl who told her brother "I'm tired of you Owen, it's time for your nap." The same girl who has said "Grandma, you frustrate me."

But luckily, it's also the same girl who runs up to me randomly, arms wide open for a hug, and proclaims "I love you soooo much!". Therefore all is forgiven.


  1. OMG I'm sorry but #3 made me LOL That is priceless stuff right there!!!

  2. LOL. Oh my. Yeah, we didn't have the "terrible twos" with my oldest. It was three that ended up being a doozie!


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