The horror of BUGS!

Being the beautiful, glorious 70something degree weather that it was outside, the kids and I set up camp in the backyard this morning after breakfast. My post was the black folding chair whose nuts and bolts are so rusted that I hold my breath each time I sit down for fear that it'll send me crashing to the ground. I sat in my chair, taking in the breeze, watching the birds, feeling the sun on my face. My son sat happily next to me, fists shoved in his mouth and a fine coat of drool covering just about every visible part of his body. Suddenly and without warning, our state of zen was disrupted by a horrific scream. I turn in time to see a pink blur run through the yard. It's Lainey, running at toddler warp speed towards me. Since I had not, in fact, offered her any Goldfish crackers this lunge at me seemed odd. And once she reached my death-chair, I saw a quivering mess comparable to that blonde chick on American Idol. Lainey was inconsolible, kicking, screaming, and had decided that she no longer wanted ANYTHING to do with this beautiful day outside. She wanted IN.

So I picked up Drooly McSlobberson and we all headed inside, where we sat on the sofa. And then Lainey did something that sent a shock through me - she crawled up on the couch and - CUDDLED with me! Now, I'm sure that seems hardly shock-worthy for some of you out there, but between this child's constant stream of energy and the fact that compared to daddy I'm about as important as toe jam, this was amazing. And perplexing. OBVIOUSLY, something outside traumatized the poor kid. But what?

I formed a mental checklist of suspects. The neighbors weren't home, so that eliminated a whole host of possibilities. Could it be the pile of pine needles that my husband had raked up the previous day? No, the only thing Lainey enjoys more than Goldfish crackers is digging into a big pile of something that will be impossible to clean out of her clothes (think sap). A dog? A raccoon? Miley Cyrus? Nothing seemed quite right...until....

BUGS! That had to be it. I had to ask delicately, for I didn't want to lose my once-in-a-lifetime cuddle. "Lainey?" I started, "Are you scared of something?" "Yes Lainey scared." Ok, I decided, enough small talk. "Are you scared of a bug?" . She started to whimper again, so I reassured her that bugs lived outside and that none would be in her room so we ought to go take a nap. Much to my surprise, it worked.

Another toddler mystery solved. The goddess in me prevails again.